Backwards....Not a Direction Worth Taking

For the first time in over a month, I gained weight during the week. Just a pound, but still. Considering the week I had last week, I wouldn't have been surprised if it had been much, much worse. Nevertheless, backwards is not a direction worth taking, as this blog entry title states. My ultimate goal is weight loss, not weight gain.

Up until now, I've neglected to post my food diaries on days I've eaten things I shouldn't have. Somehow, if I don't put it in and click that magic "submit" button, it's as if that day never happened. But I know better. And come weigh-in time, the scale certainly knows better. So as difficult as it will be to be blatantly, let-it-all-out-there honest, I'm afraid that's exactly what it's going to take. Even on travel days (which we have coming up). Even on days when I'm not in charge of my own dinner (again, as we have coming up).  And yes, even on holidays. I had originally planned to just forego journaling at all during the holiday season (from Thanksgiving through the end of the year) so that I could enjoy the holidays without guilt. But won't there still be guilt come January 2 when I weigh in and....oops!...discover that I've managed to gain back all of the weight I'd previously lost (and then some, probably)? Most certainly.

So as painful as it will be having to cut back on the peppermint ice cream, Christmas cookies, fudge (fudge!), party mix, and other goodies that I enjoy year after year, I will have to learn to enjoy these things in smaller doses (or else do 3 hours of exercises a day in order to indulge in that extra cookie. No thank you!). Which, coincidentally, is the whole point of this. I've always said that if I had to give up entirely all of the foods I love life wouldn't be worth living. And there truly isn't anything wrong with eating a dish of ice cream, or enjoying that Christmas cookie. I've just got to learn how to eat in moderation.

That is the key to this whole process. Once I have it figured out (and I mean, down pat!), I will never have to concern myself with weight issues again. Once I am finally at that place I want to be, I don't plan on looking backward to see what I've missed. Because backward is just not a direction worth taking.

And Another One (or Two) Bites The Dust!

I got on the Wii Fit balance board for my weekly weigh-in and I've lost another 2 pounds! That's a total of 7 pounds in 3 weeks! I'm very exited about this. Again, two pounds may not seem like much, but I'll take it.

As much as I am loathe to admit it, this counting calories thing is working. :-) If I keep this rate up, I'll be down almost 20 lbs by the first of the year.

And if I keep this rate up, I'll finally be under 200 again in just over a month.....for the first time in six years.

Yay me!

IT'S WORKING!

The batteries on our Wii fit balance board have been out for the last couple of weeks, limiting what kind of exercise I've been able to do (30 minutes of Wii bowling on the Sports Resort is fun, but not something you want to do EVERY DAY). Today, I finally got around to putting in new batteries so that I could do more of the aerobic workouts that require the balance board. (For example, I did 30 minutes of the Advanced step--which allows you to watch TV while you step, helping you keep track of the "beat" through the Wii remote.)

Anyway, since I hadn't weighed in awhile, I went ahead and weighed in. And discovered that I am down 5 POUNDS. IN LESS THAN 2 WEEKS. If our neighbors wouldn't think I'm a nut job, I'd be highly tempted to open our front door and scream at the top of my lungs. So I'll have to let doing a happy dance around my living room (hey....more calories burned! Score!) suffice for now.

Despite having a week in Indiana that totally messed with my eating, I STILL lost 5 pounds. I am so stoked right now, it's not even funny. I should've known things were better because my clothes are feeling a bit looser and when we traveled last week, I did not develop cankles from sitting for 12 hours. Seriously, the last trip we made in August, my ankles swelled up so big (and my legs hurt so bad) that it really scared me. This time, NO CANKLES! Yay!

For the first time in a long time, I really believe that this goal I've had in mind for a long time is actually possible.

I will be one lean and mean mama!

P.S. For those who think a Wii Fit is an extravagant purchase (especially for missionaries or folks in ministry), think how much money you would've had to pay to join a gym or Curves. This is much cheaper than monthly dues, your whole family can use it, and it's something you can take with on trips.

Now We're Getting Somewhere!

Yesterday was the start of something new for me.  My sister reccommended that I join Myfitnesspal.com for help losing weight.  You plug in your current weight and your weight goals, how much you plan to exercise, and what type of lifestyle you live, and it tells you how many daily calories you can eat and still lose weight.  Then, you keep track of your food (there are certain food items in the database that have the nutritional elements prefigured, which is helpful), exersise, and water consumption throughout the day.  Any exercise you do increases your caloric intake for the day.  The nice thing is that you can see very clearly if you need to step up your exerscise for the day in order to offset a bit of overeating you did.  Very nice!  Yesterday, even with the bit of exersise I did, I was still below my alloted calories.  Today it might be a bit closer.  But with the tools provided, I'm looking forward to losing weight in the next few months.  I know it will be slow (I selected the 1-pound a week weight loss goal), but I'm hoping that this will help me make more of a lifestyle change, keeping the weight off once I'm down to my goal weight.

My ultimate goal is to be at a whole new size by the time we're finished with language school and ready for the move to Mexico City (hopefully for the fall of 2012).  I've been dealing with weight for the last 15 years, encompassing 2 decades of my life.  The idea of entering my 40s in great shape is thrilling!

Some Minor Changes

I am excellent at making plans. What I am not so good at is following through. But if you've read any of the posts in this blog, you already knew that.

One morning about three weeks ago, I decided to make a few changes--mostly in diet--just to see what happened. So, I bought an assortment of vegetables (lettuce & red cabbage mix, green peppers, red peppers, cucumbers, broccoli, and cauliflower in particular), several different bottles of Kraft Light dressings, some diet ice cream (more in a minute), and yogurt.

Each morning for breakfast, I eat a small portion of the generic brand of Honey Nut Cheerios (minus any added sugar) with milk and a small container of either strawberry or peach yogurt, along with a big mug of hot tea (with milk and sugar--not exactly the healthiest way to drink it, but babysteps). For lunch, I enjoy a big bowl of the lettuce mixture along with bits of each of the cut-up vegetables.  Now, in the past I have tried various "diet" dressings and hated them.  However, I've now tried the Kraft Light House Italian and the Kraft Light Catalina and they are both awesome! And I've learned to enjoy a lot less dressing on my salad than I used to.

I've been limiting my soda intake to weekends and on those occasions we are out to eat, but I'm working my way down to cutting them out altogether (I know--gasp!).  It helps to not have it in the house.  Anyway, I've really been enjoying the Grape Crystal Light, which is helping me to increase my water intake.

I still get one regular meal a day, but I've been trying to watch the portion sizes. There's also no snacking during the day. Desserts are limited to no more than 150 calories, and I've only been allowing myself two of them each day. There are a number of yummy 100-calorie cookie packs that I've enjoyed (the 100-calorie Oreos are decently good, if a little crispy). As we all know, I absolutely adore ice cream. Diet ice cream is something I've eschewed for quite some time, and I ate so much sherbet growing up that I won't eat it now. However, I've discovered that dieters can actually eat ice cream, thanks to the Skinny Cow brand. I've tried the ice cream bars, ice cream sandwiches, and the little 1-serving containers of soft ice cream and there is nothing that tastes remotely "diet". The mint-truffle bars are delish, as are both the mint and chocolate ice cream sandwiches. I've tried the vanilla (which is okay), the chocolate peanut butter, and the cookies and cream flavors as well. Next on my list to try is the strawberry shortcake ice cream sandwiches.

Anyway, along with all of these small changes, I hope to also increase the daily exercise. Troy and I have made a deal that for every 25 pounds I lose, he will pay for me to stay in a hotel overnight by myself! Sounds like an incentive to me! Stay tuned!

The Dreaded "S" Season

This blasted heat, while intensely uncomfortable, also serves as a harbringer of that most unpleasant "s" season to come. Lest you misunderstand, the "s" season I'm referring to is made possible by the other "s" season which actually appears on our calendars. Yes, I'm talking about the dreaded swimsuit season. Ack! That name alone conjurs up horrifying images and feelings from deep within.

This was to be the summer spent on Costa Rican beaches. Since I've been granted a temporary repreive--a stay of execution, it feels like at times--it behooves me to seek to use this coming year wisely so that next year, God willing, I can frolick on those beautiful beaches without shame or self-reproach. When to begin? Some would say "there's no time like the present!", and I would agree but for the unpleasant facts of summer life and the perils that they bring. Namely, these include travel, vacation, and camp life.

Traveling, unless done in short doses, always has an adverse effect on my appearance. My ankles cease to be ankles and take on a most disturbing "cankle"-like quality. In order to appease a "let's just get there" mentality, there is a significant amount of fast food eaten. And as a rule, fast food equals unhealthy food. Vacation is little better. Although eating out will be a rarity (typically only reserved for take out pizza from "The Tavern"), how can I resist the siren song of Anderson Erickson chocolate milk? And while better than drinking a soda (and with some calcium to boot!), I'm sure too much of it would be frowned on by dieticians. The biggest detriment to any weight-loss progress, perhaps comes in the form of camp life. During the course of our two weeks at camp, we partake of three very genergous, very tasty, squares a day, where one has the opportunity to enjoy fresh fried chicken every day! But for me, worse of all is the close proximity to all the chocolate ice cream I can possibly afford to eat (chocoalte soft serve is considered something of a unicorn here in Mississippi). Ahh, the bliss! Don't get me wrong--I love camp! There is much to feed the body and the soul there. We have come home every year full both in body and in spirit. And, too, not having a golf cart to navigate the hills on camp allows some exercise.

Swimsuits are an evil to a girl like me, things that look as appealing on us as do mu-mus.  I actually did manage to find one that is not completely hideous looking even if it doesn't magically make me appear ten pounds thinner (as some of the adds for certain bathing suits boast). If I were a braver soul, I would immediately put on my suit, snap a picture, and then post it on this blog as a "before", promising to post another picture next summer (on a beach in Costa Rica, perhaps), as the "after". Hmm. Dare I?

New Year, New Shot

February 8. Yeeeaahhh. Obviously, it's been awhile since I last blogged. (And thank you, Robin, for the encouragement to keep at it.) I refuse to beat myself up about my long absence from my goals; is it really helpful, after all? Can I go back in time and change things? No. So here goes. A whole new year, a whole new shot to get this right. Aaaahhhh.

I should probably do a whole new measurement as well, but since it's already the 8th of the month, and February is such a short month, I'll go ahead and wait until next month to do the measuring. But I am at 209. I know that. Now, I can't remember exactly what my last weigh-in was, but I'm thinking I had a gain over the last couple months. Oh well. Again, can't be changed.

A friend of mine and I were discussing weight loss and goal weights yesterday. I said that my goal weight was 130. I've been told that 125-135 would be a good weight for me, which I think is much more realistic and healthier all around than the 114 the Wii Fit says I should be. Good grief--I haven't been that trim since high school, maybe my first year of college. Do I really care to get back to that size? Not really. I'll be 35 in less than 6 months now and I've had four children. Is it realistic for me to weigh what I did in high school? Naaah. How many mothers my age or older (okay, mothers without their own personal trainers or chefs) are as slim as they were in high school? Not many I know.

So what am I going to do to change things? Thanks to my wonderful hubby and all his extra hours of side jobs on the weekends we were home this fall, I have a Wii Fit Plus and a Biggest Loser game to shake up my daily workouts. Yes, I can let Jillian Michaels kick my tooshie on a daily basis (and she does!). I've also been working on drinking more water, eschewing the sodas (but oh, do I love my sodas!), and avoiding the snacking. I purposely do not stock the house with yummy snacks because I know I do not have great self control (why else would I be at 209 lbs?). On a sidebar, and something I'm particularly proud of, there have been 2 Cadbury Creme eggs in my house since Saturday. That is a huge thing. Now that I've reminded myself that they're in fact awaiting me in the kitchen, I'm going to focus on something else so that I do not get up and go get them. I love Cadbury Creme eggs! But I certainly do not need to eat one at barely 9 AM when I haven't even had breakfast yet. How long can they sit there without being eaten? Hmmm. Anyway! Along with my lack of exercise and proper eating habits, my devotions have been lacking as well (to my shame). I'm working on reistablishing my 6 AM wakeup each morning so that I have time for my devotions before the kids wake up. My time with the Lord should be more important to me than a few extra minutes of sleep. Speaking of a few extra minutes of sleep, I need to reistablish my 10:30 bedtime (with lights out no later than 11) so that I have plenty of time to sleep each night.

As I said earlier, this is the year I will turn 35. I want to develop good discipline habits NOW, this year. At the end of the year, I want to no longer be the lazy, undisciplined woman that I am now. Everything else will follow. That is the very best resolution I can have by far. Pray for me!